Beethoven Analysis – Piano Sonata in Eb (WOo47)

800px-Thirteen-year-old_Beethoven

INTRODUCTION TO THE KURFURSTEN SONATAS

We first see Beethoven writing piano sonatas in 1783, not the wild man we turned into a titan genius through myth but a mere boy of twelve. By this time Beethoven’s father Johan could no longer teach his son through his brutal methods so he turned his son over to more able tutors such as Christian Neefe, who introduced the young Beethoven to Johan Sebastian Bach’s Well-Tempered Clavier. The boy learned quickly, practicing on the piano long past midnight for many nights to refine his skills, soon mastering J.S. Bach’s works.

Beethoven occupied himself with other tasks and hobbies. He played the organ in his church and the viola in the court orchestras of the prince electors ruling Bonn at the time. – The nation of Germany did not yet exist; the land was part of the Holy Roman Empire, broken into many small territories each ruled by a different prince. – In his spare time, Beethoven frequented the local university lectures, salons, and other forums, and quickly became enchanted by the principles of the Enlightenment, ideals he held until his final days.

The young Beethoven composed his first three piano sonatas in this climate, dedicating them to his Prince Elector Maximillian Frederick as per custom. The pianist Ronald Brautigam describes, in his booklet that comes with his recordings of Beethoven’s piano sonatas, that Beethoven drew heavily on Carl Phillip Bach’s “sensitive style” keyboard works and Haydn’s “storm and stress” piano sonatas. He then mentions how Beethoven was lucky his father was too drunk to discipline his son to compose in a so-called proper style; had Mozart tried to write such music his father would have stopped him.

I am listening to C.P.E Bach’s keyboard works as I write this very essay and I do hear some of the same muses who stirred Beethoven when he was only a teenager and would inspire him for the rest of his life. The music is indeed in a “sensitive style”, with touching melodies one moment and stormy, abrupt chords in another, elements Beethoven puts in his own sonatas. I hear adolescent melancholy, youthful play, ventures in playing dark and difficult music, and some sight into the abstract realms music takes you when you really listen to it.

Let us now study the first of these earliest sonatas. I created a road map, posted just below this paragraph, and a YouTube video with the entire sonata in annotations, link at https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7tWsQlPM1rg.

Scan Forms i

MOVEMENT ONE – ALLEGRO CANTABILE

The first movement, unlike Beethoven’s later sonatas, does not have any clear first subject, second subject, and so forth. It is like Mozart’s earlier sonatas and Classical ideals in general; you hear one gracious melodic line, then another, a new idea develops, all in balance and harmony. You can really think of movement one’s sonata form as a few melodies in Eb, then a few melodies in Bb, and so on.

Beethoven thinks along these lines of balance and harmony, his ideas mostly abstract, not trying to state any definite idea. He does explore a simple contrast between a high delicate woodwind range, a warm middle string range, and low stormy range. He does put more thought in his later “Kurfursten” sonatas on what he wants to say and how to say it; in the Fm sonata he explores loftier thoughts, but he is not used to writing in sonata form at the moment. Give the kid a break. He should do better things anyway, like try to get rid of his pimples, go to Hot Topic, and flirt with girls.

Beethoven’s “main subject” is made of a few melodies with little relation, but they do connect in the same way a few sentences create a paragraph; the paragraph being the “first subject”. The boy does put some color and contrast between sentences; sentence one has a rising then falling arc and implies a string ensemble (bars 1-4), another sentence leaps then falls in a woodwind’s register (bars 11-14).

When he modulates he plays many sixteenth notes to amp up the tension. Beethoven is technically in Bb already but he wants to establish a Bb harmony by modulating, so he does so as if he was in Eb in two sentences. In his first sentence he starts his first phrase in Bb, the second phrase in C (bars 15-18). He changes the harmony by moving it up a whole step, a technique Beethoven is fond of. The whole point of his exercise is to move to F, the V chord (or dominant) of Bb. By using the F harmony, Beethoven “overshoots” so he can play a V-I cadence of F-Bb.

The “subordinate subject” (bars 25-30) is very short and also counts as a closing statement, but what a striking and playful tune it is! Beethoven plays it twice, once as a flute, another as a violin. He brings back a similar contrast as before in his “first subject” but the order is reversed (woodwinds first, strings second). Beethoven does develop a few simple ideas; a contrast between high and low keys, and he develops it further.

We can break down the development into two “cores” where Beethoven explores an idea in the exposition. The first “core” . (bars 30-40). imitates the second idea but in Cm, among the highest keys. Nothing too new here. The second “core“ (bars 48-55)  is made of arpeggios in minor chords, mostly Cm, the register low, dark, stormy. He retransitions to the “main subject” easily by playing Bb then Eb.

I can only comment little on the recapitulation since everything is the same as before, just a 5th lower, in Eb. The only difference is the “main theme” is truncated, so we only hear one sentence. For a while I wondered by Beethoven played a sentence in Bb so soon (bars 11-14) but I may have a clue now. Beethoven may have seen how the line in the recap is in Eb exactly repeats the line in the expo, so he may have changed the latter to Bb to avoid repeating himself and create a bigger feeling of returning home as the movement closes.

MOVEMENT TWO – ANDANTE CANTABILE

Beethoven shows his true talent and craft in this movement. Like in many sonatas, including the Fm sonata, the middle movement is the heart of the sonata, the highest seat of thought and feeling and a fulcrum between the two fast movements. Beethoven uses this form in many later sonatas throughout his career but he takes it to a much higher level. A good slow movement can change the nature of the entire sonata, such a crucible seems to transform the music as you go from the first movement to the last movement. As a composer myself, I find slow movements hardest to write but when I do it somehow helps me write later fast movements far better.

In the second movement we can really see Beethoven express the sensitive style he picked up from C.P.E. Bach as he sings his lonesome and tender song. The constant mood is of adolescent melancholy; you truly understand how sad and lonely this boy was, with no intimate friends, with only a few sensitive adult women to comfort and protect him. Already we see the young Beethoven improving as a composer in learning what emotions to express and what techniques he needs to do so.

Beethoven sets this mood by cleverly using chromatic notes in the treble and base and in the way he uses his sentences; he makes them “two-bodied” where the first phrase or clause, if you can call it that, is simpler and the second one is more complicated and intense. You tend to hear this in the second part (of B part) of the exposition and recapitulation. However, his base is somewhat staid, as he plays Alberti base for almost the entire movement. He lets the melody do most of the work and, like in a lot of early classical music, the base is used for harmonic filler.

In the main subject and very short transition (bars 1-13), Beethoven makes both Bb and Eb natural. This adds color, yes, but also suggests the key of C, which is the V chord of F, the dominant. He plays a chromatic rising base as he transitions, up from Bb, to B, to C. This way he plays an inverted F chord, making the cadence imperfect, keeping suspense kind of like how a novelist refuses to resolve the plot of a story just yet. The harmonies he implies throughout are Bb, F, C, F (IV-V-V/V-V), again he “overshoots” by playing a C-F cadence, which is V-I relative to the key of F.

Beethoven writes two subordinates subjects in F. The first subject (bars 14-19), is in the tenor and base registers. Beethoven suggests a viola and cello, the warm tones contrast high notes in the rest of the piece. It is a shame Beethoven doesn’t use more contrast. He again plays a chromatic rising base, this time suggesting Bb-F (IV-I) harmonies, and again keeps us in suspense with an imperfect cadence.

The second subject (bars 19-25) is more straightforward. The harmony is “offbeat here”, starting as V-I not I-V, and Beethoven plays a string of 32nd notes in fortissimo afterward to intensify the emotion. He also plays an F# note, implying Gm to make the harmony more ambiguous. Beethoven is very fond of the F# and Bh chromatic notes in the second and third movement of this sonata. And finally, he plays a perfect cadence at the end, resolving the tension he set up earlier and leading us to a poignant closing statement (bars 26-31).

The development section (bars 31-37) is very short but Beethoven makes good use of it by playing many chromatic notes; these include F#, G#, Eb, and C#. While Beethoven technically plays F-C7 (I-V) the whole time the chromatic notes imply other harmonies like Am, Cm, and Dm. In the very brief retransition he plays the Bb note at the end to imply a subdominant harmony (relative to the key of F) to return to the home key of Bb.

The recapitulation, like in the last movement, repeats the exposition almost verbatim, most of the material is transposed a 4th higher. The main subject (bars 38-42) is shortened so much it merges with the transition to make one sentence. The second subordinate subject (bars 49-56) has an extra bar but it is important. Beethoven uses it to play an Ab note; at the moment it suggests a Bb7 chord but in the entire subject it creates a strong subdominant feel. Most composers at the time dwelled in the IV chord in their recapitulations to anchor your sense of hearing back to the home key and usually to play a IV-V-I harmony. Beethoven does something similar here.

MOVEMENT THREE – RONDO, VIVACE

Beethoven changes form in this movement; now he opts for a rondo form not the usual sonata form, but it does sound a lot like a sonata. Its three main stanzas of A,B,C each resemble an exposition, development, and recapitulation, and each stanza is made of four lines of a,b,c,d. Like the first movement, this last movement is made of a string of different melodies that have little relation to each other but the emotions expressed are more intense. The major lines are more zesty and playful, the minor ones more brooding, the cadenzas otherworldly.

In stanza A, line a (bars 1-8) is a theme in Eb in the standard I-V-I harmony. Line b (bars 9-16) acts like a transition of sorts; Beethoven plays a arpeggios throughout to fill out harmonies, he toys with a chromatic rising base a bit to create Ebaug harmony, and later modulates by playing Bb-Cm7-F-Bb. Line c, the “subordinate subject” (bars 17-23), Beethoven plays arpeggios again, just with the hands reversed, plays Bb and Eb to create a I-IV-I feeling, as if he didn’t modulate to Bb at all. Beethoven ends the line by playing Edim7 then holding out on F a bit. This is a diminished cadence where the composer plays viidim7-I rather than the usual V-I (relative to F in this case). It adds some spice to the music and lets the composer travel to a distant key easily without having to worry about a V-I cadence. It becomes clear to us at this point this piece focuses more on harmonies than having distinct melodies, a contrast to the first two movements, especially the second movement.

His closing statement is in two sentences (bars 18-36). Beethoven must get back all the way from F (which is a whole step above Eb, notice how this parallels the first movement) to Eb. He does this by going down the harmonies by 4ths, from F to Bb to Eb. Once there, he goes briefly to Cm before going to Bb (playing I-V-I) where he suspends us in a Bb chord. We are now in the end of stanza A, the suspending chord acts as a cadenza, which many pianists fail to improvise as they lack invention.

Stanza B begins. Line a (bars 37-44) is our familiar first tune. Now in line b (bars 38-55), we enter the first “core” of a “development” section. Here Beethoven explores the arpeggios from before but this time he cycles through a bunch of flat harmonies close to Eb; these are Ab, Fm, Bb, Gm, Cm, Bb7, and F7. The second “core” in line c (bars 56-62), he plays a Ebdim7-F cadence so he can hold on to F a bit. Then in line c, the “retransition”, (bars 63-71) he hangs around Ebmin (the minor version of the home key) before arriving to a second cadenza in Bb.

Stanza C mimics a recapitulation but Beethoven is more inventive here than in the last two movements. Before he played the exact same material just a 4th below in harmony. Now he does a few new things. We hear the first tune again (bars 72-79) as a “main subject”, barely any different than before. In line b, the “transition” (bars 80-87), he moves to Cm. He returns to using diminished cadences, this time twice; first with Bdim7-Cm, then with F#dim7-G. In line c, the “subordinate subject” (bars 88-99), is in Eb with the standard V-I, spiced up a bit with Ab (the subdominant) and another diminished cadence from F#dim7-Gm. Next Beethoven hangs around Cm, playing V-I with some Fm in it. This Cm sentence thus mirrors the Eb sentence before.

We enter the final cadenza, the notes held out in a single voice on the C note. Then we enter line d, the “closing section” (lines 100-109), where the main tune repeats again with a small extra flourish at the end to finish the movement. The main Eb theme changes very little throughout the entire movement, which shows how the young Beethoven is still pretty new to sonata form. The mature Beethoven would never repeat himself like that, a good counterexample being his “Rage Over a Lost Penny” rondo. He transforms the theme in so many ways; he changes its register, plays it in a remote key, diminishes it, embellishes it, shortens it, develops bits of it elsewhere in the piece, makes at least two variations out of it, uses it build a coda, and so on, all in five and a half minutes. However, the young Beethoven’s genius is emerging, even now he is getting the knack of writing complex and passionate music.

 

Dr. Fabiszewski Answers Life’s Biggest Questions

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MOLLY: It’s so good for you to be with us for this interview, Dr. Fabiszewski. So many students and young adults are trying to navigate the world during these dark and troubling times while so many extreme ideologues battle it out on media platforms to win as many souls as they can.

FABISZEWSKI: That is exactly what is happening today. So many different kinds of churches emerged over the last decade, each with their own scripture, congregation, logos, proselytizing, and attempts at converting people to their cause. The biggest examples that come to mind are media outlets: Brietbart, Infowars, the “skeptic” community on YouTube, The Young Turks, Jezebel, and Buzzfeed just to name a few. No church worships a god yet we haven’t seen so much persecution, partisanship, and religious fervor since the English Civil War.

Meanwhile, our professors at University have cloistered themselves in their ivory towers. They rarely use reason and education as an antidote to the toxic info-wars (as it were) outside. This forces drunk, stoned old satyrs like me to take the battle of the books to the street when I’d rather be fucking one of my freshman. When reason sleeps, monsters are born. Our professors hide in the classroom while bullies stand on the tub. Milton! thou shouldst be living at this hour: England hath need of thee! But Milton is of the Devil’s party in Hell so poor old fools like me have to stand in his place.

MOLLY: Do you suggest that professors must take the pulpit and become preachers themselves?

FABISZEWSKI: Yes. It is inevitable, but they can still use reason and nuance to some extent to enlighten us all and not merely preach to the converted. Or they can be me: the gadfly who the nonexistent God attached to the State, always fastening upon you, arousing and persuading and reproaching you. Kids out there can use my answers as a short guide to life; a down to earth manual free of academic jargon and twisted abstractions, or get triggered by it. I don’t care as you dance, laugh, and think about it.

MOLLY: So let’s get to it, Dr. Irasmus Dominico Gregorovic Alexander Fabiszewski’s Guide to Life! Let’s start with one of the biggest questions out there. Is there a God?

FABISZEWSKI: How the fuck is anyone supposed to know! Assuming gods do or don’t exist with such certainty is ludicrous. Atheists and theists are retarded; the debate is that pointless. This is one of the dumbest, most cliché questions out there so I’m glad to get it done over with. Hopefully none of my others answers will be as long as this.

The quests for spiritual answers are deeper than this, and there are different levels of being woke. The least woke position is thinking your dogma and scripture, word by word, is the only correct one and your soul goes to heaven after you die. The atheist version is taking life painfully literally, like believing there is only the physical universe, being “rational” will solve everything but everyone else is just too irrational and stupid, and only the so-called “hard” sciences matter. Ditch your Christopher Hitchens, Richard Dawkins, C.S. Lewis, and William Craig; they’re pleb tier garbage. Read Heraclitus, the Buddha, and Spinoza instead.

Every deeper view of the world is something like this: the universe is constantly changing through creation and destruction, new miracles and horrors begin and end all the time. The universe is awesome and awful, it’s all part of the greater package. You are part of that cycle, always growing and self-generating, you will one day return from whence you came and transform into something new. Life is best lived without expectations or submission to people who try to make you live your life as they want you to; it’s best to be surprised by joy and live doing what you love. The best understanding of God is being totally loved by someone and receiving that love with gratitude. Wow, C.S. Lewis was more woke than I thought.

MOLLY: Whew! That was a big one! You seemed to cover all the basics at once!

FABISZEWSKI: You bet I did, sweetheart!

MOLLY: So what about philosophy versus science? Which one is better?

FABISZEWSKI: Science is part of philosophy. Everything that uses the human brain and heart is part of philosophy in one way or another, and thus can’t be truly boxed in a narrow discipline or way or thinking.

MOLLY: Speaking of academics, is academia useful or a waste of time?

FABISZEWSKI: Depends on how you use it. Studying different academic ways of thinking is useful in learning how to critically think about the world around you and analyze it in a thorough and nuanced way. But reading books too often makes you near-sighted, both physically and mentally. I made this mistake when I was young. Your body needs to move, work, get knocked around a bit. Your body needs to touch and smell; it can’t do with just a mental image. You’re not a mind in a body, as much academic writing trains you to assume; you’re a body.

MOLLY: Are the so-called soft sciences and philosophy itself a waste of time? More right wing pundits seem to value only the so-called hard sciences.

FABISZEWSKI: Philosophy is fun, best done while dancing, laughing, and fucking. Get dirty. Right wing pundits are tedious, joyless boors, who can’t even realize that there are no “hard” sciences without “soft” sciences. The very distinction is ridiculous; pundits made it up only to demean and demonize something they’re scared of and don’t understand.

MOLLY: Nietzsche is one of your favorite philosophers. Can you tell us more about him?

FABISZEWSKI: Don’t quote Nietzsche or even try to live by him until you actually read him. I’m talking to you, edgy atheists!

MOLLY: Is it okay to punch Nazis and cops?

FABISZEWSKI: Yes, but be prepared for a long, violent, difficult fight. Mind viruses like fascism and racism are hard to cure. Nazis want to fight and they won’t rest until they get their asses kicked.

MOLLY: What is the meaning of life?

FABISZEWSKI: Forty-two. Duh.

MOLLY: What about the social justice politics that’s been going on recently? And the people for social justice and against it?

FABISZEWSKI: I’m all for social justice. The fact people are still as bigoted as they are today is why aliens don’t contact us. Our monkey brains can’t see past our made up factions, or even see how absurd morals and politics are most of the time. I’m a university professor who is always high, so of course I’m a degenerate-commie-pinko-Marxist-Leninist-Illuminati-reptoid-Jew-pedophile who brainwashes innocent children into thinking people who look weird or different to them are people too.

But I can’t applaud how progressives go about their social justice quest. Their politics are naïve and useless. Standing against thinks like cultural appropriation and micro-aggressions while standing for things like safe spaces is fine, but cultural appropriation and micro-aggressions are superficial manifestations of deeper problems, and can’t be solved by just “educating” liberal-minded people (which most Americans are) on how bigoted they are. When I was a student, we progressives went for the state’s jugular. We stood strong against the cops who enforced racist laws and turned the fire hose on black people. We forced sexist bosses and politicians to acknowledge women as human beings. The fact such direct, effective leftist politics has been so demonized in American culture by the right wing is proof the right wing have a big advantage. We are fighting by their rules when we shouldn’t.

And the worst part is so many progressive have such a defeating attitude. The far right, ironically, has the most slave morality (as Nietzsche would call it). Whether you’re talking about Neo Nazis, white nationalists, so-called Men’s Rights Activists, Pickup Artists etc. they’re philosophy is never “How can I be a winner?” but “Why am I a loser?” Progressives have the same bad habit. – All political factions do in fact as resentment and hatred over hurt and loss bring people together and are easy to exploit. – If progressives want to win they need to spend more time enacting solid plans that truly empower themselves and the people they’re fighting for. Our dear leader Donald Trump said, “I don’t like losers.” It’s the only thing I agree with him on. But that’s just me talking, a privileged white male shitlord who fought in politics before my students were born.

MOLLY: What would you tell any of your students who are alt right or against social justice?

FABISZEWSKI: Pepe memes are pleb tier. They’re neither original nor insightful, and are as common as dogshit in a park. As Walt graded Jesse in Breaking Bad, “Ridiculous! Apply yourself!” This is why you fail my classes.

MOLLY: Do we live in a simulation? You know, like in the Matrix?a

FABISZEWSKI: Probably, but who gives a fuck.

MOLLY: What do you like more, Star Wars or Star Trek?

FABISZEWSKI: Star Wars. It’s a silly fantasy for kids but Star Trek pretends to be serious sci-fi when it isn’t. Arthur C. Clarke and Isaac Asimov it ain’t!

MOLLY: Any advice to your students about sex and relationships?

FABISZEWSKI: Fuck to your heart’s context but don’t delude yourself into thinking you love someone. You’re too young and stupid to know what love is let alone share a mortgage with someone.

MOLLY: A lot of your students are New Age? Any words to them about that?

FABISZEWSKI: New Age is a bullshit fantasy. It sounds profound at first glance but the more you think about it the dumber it gets, like the racist fantasies of right wing blowhards. Being a badass in video games is a fantasy for little boys, being a badass in video games is a fantasy for men. Being a princess is a fantasy for little girls, being a Wiccan princess with goddess powers is a fantasy for women.

MOLLY: How many genders are there?

FABISZEWSKI: Only two. You conform to what society thinks you should be or you don’t and act as your own person.

MOLLY: What would you suggest to your students who want to become academics in the future?

FABISZEWSKI: Value humor, wit, and play. Stodgy idiots of all stripes devalue humor and satire as something superficial. They’re wrong and should die in a way that makes people laugh at them. Humor gives an extra dimension to experiencing life through irony. It redeems us of our proverbial original sin.

MOLLY: What TV shows would you recommend to children?

FABISZEWSKI: I have two daughters. I recommend them Hey Arthur while they’re young kids, Batman the Animated Series for when they’re older kids, Daria for when they’re teens, Rick and Morty for when they’re young adults, and Bojack Horseman for when they’re mature enough to understand life.

MOLLY: Is it better to be an optimist or a pessimist?

FABISZEWSKI: Optimist. After two centuries of soggy and pretentious cynicism and angst, Renaissance and Enlightenment ideals should once more emerge. Personally, I take life in stride, admire power and strength in the creative sense, attract towards dynamic people and artworks that convey an ongoing process of growth and deepening, love to be around people who enlarge me and make me laugh. I do not neglect the dark and difficult sides of life, neither do any of the people I admire. I revel in the dark and difficult in life; it gives me strength and challenges to overcome, and I feel no greater joy than when I overcome terrible things.

MOLLY: Last question, who is the Ubermensch?

FABISZEWSKI: The Ubermensch is not a person. It is an achievement when a human being overcomes the cycles of fear, hatred, and resentment inherent in the human condition and lives fully and joyfully as a creative being. It’s like Nirvana except way cooler.

MOLLY: Thank you for your time, Mr. Fabiszewski. You’re wisdom is truly appreciated.

FABISZEWSKI: No, thank you. May the Force be with you, always.

BIOGRAPHIES:
Dr. Irasmus Dominico Gregorovic Alexander Fabiszewski is a revered and long-standing Professor of Philosophy at the University of Colorodo-Boulder. An iconoclastic thinker, Dr. Fabiszewski eschews more academic approaches to philosophy in favor of direct real world learning experiences. His favorite philosophers are Socrates, Spinoza, Sade, and Nietzsche, with honorable mentions to Osho, Alan Watts, Deepak Chopra, and Terrance McKenna. He is the notorious instigator of marijuana festivals on campus, once forcing the University to close down for a week. His favorite hobbies include smoking marijuana, having orgies with his students, getting drunk, getting high on psychedelics, looting capitalist centers during riots, and annoying people in festivals and protests.

Molly Jane Wesley is a senior at the University of Colorodo-Boulder, Mastering in Philosophy and Fine Art. A long-standing colleague, favored student, and Assistant Professor to Dr. Fabiszewski, Molly has ambitions of starting a jewelry and arts and crafts business on Etsy and founding an alternative pharmacy of witchcraft and alternative medicine. Molly enjoys getting high on Miami Beach during vacations and starring in pro-sex feminist pornography.

Beethoven Analysis – Piano Sonata in D (WoO 47)

800px-Thirteen-year-old_Beethoven

FIRST MOVEMENT – ALLEGRO

Beethoven’s last “Kurfursten” sonata is more lighthearted in tone than his first two sonatas, especially the dark and sublime sonata in Fm, but it has the most intricate design of all three. The young Beethoven does not necessarily develop his musical ideas more thoroughly than before but he does expand the overall structure of sonata form. He uses his musical material a little more purposefully and he makes some savvy use of mutations, chord progressions, and sixteenth notes.

I created a roadmap (below) and a YouTube video of the sonata with all annotations. Link here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WkJKexgQIE4

Scan Form iii

The first movement is in sonata form. We turn to the exposition; the main subject (bars 1-12) has treble notes in intervals of 3rds and 6ths to give the music a mild, relaxing feel. This subject in particular evokes the image of a lounge room, gentle and reclining, and is thus similar to the second movement of Mozart’s Symphony no. 23, which also treble notes spaced apart in 3rds. In either case, Beethoven uses accidentals to be more diverse with his harmonies as playing I-V-I can get boring fast if no ideas are developed soon; I refer to the G#3 note base implying E (V/V) and the Ch5 note implying D7 (V7). Beethoven uses those accidentals and harmonies to rise slightly above and dip slightly below the I-V chords. He also uses them to lead to the next relevant harmony. E (V/V) leads to A (V) in a V-I cadence of sorts (relevant to the key of A). D7(I7) leads to G(IV) as using I7 is a common way of dipping down to the IV chord or subdominant.

The second sentence is much plainer in its harmonies; only using I-V7 chords but Beethoven does develop his main subject a bit. He flips the descending 3rds from before upside down to create a rising melodic line. He plays arpeggios in the base but it is not the cliché Alberti base. The transition (bars 13-17) is short and boils down to Beethoven’s strategy here; he descends down the scale from the D2-D3 octave to the G#1-G#2 octave, then just rises up a m2, leading to A2 (is not an octave). The arpeggios in the treble imply the harmonies that happen; here Beethoven deviates a little into Bm7 (vi7), then to G (IV), before going to E (V/V) and A (V). This transition is pretty quick and simple but it does show how Beethoven makes good use of something simple and basic like playing notes down a scale.

In first subordinate subject (bars 18-31) Beethoven takes the eight note snippets from the transition and changes them a bit to create material, allowing the snippets to make turns and rise up and fall down as a melody. And he mutates to Am just to make it more interesting. He wants to dip down back to D (to play IV-I chords relative to A) in the second sentence so he uses the C#dim7 harmony as a leading town. Beethoven then uses arpeggios here to stop the first sentence from dropping the tension but he sharpens the 3rd note in each one to make a more interesting sound.

The second subordinate subject (bars 32-37) is much plainer with the more typical Alberti arpeggios in the treble and a simple V-I harmony. Beethoven does this to trick you, to make it sound like he is making his closing remarks to end the exposition. V-I-V-I, done! But he is not. He takes a brief detour in Am (38-44), using an E-B-E7 (V-V/V-V7) cadence at the end to keep the music suspended on the V or dominant harmony. Had Beethoven used a E-A-E7 (V-I-V7) cadence it would work too but it would be less special and would be less able to hold you up in the air. The last sentence in the exposition (bars 45-50) is plain and finally wraps it up. This is the first piano piece where Beethoven purposefully delays an ending to develop ideas more and keep the suspense lasting longer. This technique will become one of his staple skills in later years.

Beethoven makes a long development section with two cores. He follows custom with a pre-core (bars 50-57) to prepare for the first core, where he transposes the main subject to A and chances it a bit to emphasize Bm. As I look back on other sonatas and symphonies, I see how often composers base their pre-cores off the main subject. At first I wondered why they did this but now I have an idea. In older music, like the music of Haydn, and even older music, like the music of Scarlatti, sonata form hardly had a development section; it was basically an exposition and recapitulation repeated twice. The pre-core is like the main subject but it is used to lead to “cores” where a bit of music is cycled through many different keys.

Moving on, the first core (bars 58-64) is made of material taken from the transition. Beethoven uses Bm as a home key with a lot of D7, the relative major, thrown in as if to show how the core relates to the home key. Bm has another use; Beethoven can mutate it into B7 and easily take us E. In fact, this is the key of the second core and retransition (bars 65-73), and Beethoven uses the second sentence of the first subordinate subject as material. Beethoven uses E to hang on A (the V chord or dominant of D) at the retransition, at this point we can see Beethoven’s entire plan. Bm led to E led to A. Beethoven starts at the relative minor of the home key (D) so he could go down the circle of fifths. His plan has a purpose in style not just in form; he moves down the circle of fifths to create a more relaxed feeling to the listener, fitting the nature of this sonata. He uses a similar tactic in the “Archduke” piano trio decades later.

We are in the recapitulation. The main subject (bars 73-77) is triumphant and slightly embellished; this slight altering made to announce the return of the main subject, after which we go straight to the first subordinate subject. The transition is completely gone, like it was in the first movement of the Fm sonata. Perhaps Beethoven felt adding a transition after such a big development was too much. He certainly does not do such a thing in his later work. In fact, he even goes so far to play the main subject differently and create a new transition more or less based on the old one, to develop the music even further, to keep the tension going, yet also to give the music a sense of homecoming. It is similar to how you end an argument by repeating your main points but not verbatim and add some important points to provoke thought long after you leave the podium or put down your pen. In this sonata, while Beethoven skips the transition, he does develop what comes after.

The first subordinate subject (bars 78-87) is strikingly in G (IV) instead of the usual D(I), done so to not stay on the home key for so long. The movement is not done yet! Mozart did something similar in the first movement of his “Facile” piano sonata where he played the main subject in F(IV) in the recapitulation. Beethoven himself does the same in the “Name Day” overture. The point is to further emphasize the IV harmony or subdominant while not being stale. If you should play some notes in IV why not play entire subjects and base the recapitulation around it? Though this will be the last time Beethoven takes this specific approach; that is playing subordinate subjects in the subdominant.

The second subordinate subject (bars 88-99) is in G but has 4 bars of extra material where Beethoven uses octaves in the base to go down the A7 and G chords to spell out the harmonies. A7-G (V7-IV) seems awkward at first but it’s more interesting than D7-G (I7-IV) and Beethoven uses it to play G7-D-A7-D (IV7-I-V7-I), a IV-V-I sequence in essence, to finally return to D. The closing statements (bars 100-112) begin in Dm and Beethoven uses three rising V-V/V-V7 (this time A-E-A7) chords to keep you hanging. The rest is in D.

SECOND MOVEMENT – MENUETTO, SOSTENUTO

Beethoven tries out a theme and variations in a piano sonata in the first time. While he does use some interesting harmonies his overall approach is typical for his time. Most eighteenth century composers, Haydn and Mozart included, would start with a simple melody and embellish it more and more with each new variation. Sometimes they play a variation where the key is mutated, played simply and often poignant, as resting point of sorts. The last variations are embellished again, sometimes to a greater degree than before, sometimes not so. Beethoven will break these rules later in his career, especially in his late period works, piano sonatas No. 30 and No. 32 and the Diabelli Variations; where he breaks down the theme to its basic structure and transforms it into something new each variation. But it is not that day. Beethoven is only twelve now.

The theme (bars 1-16) or subject that builds the entire movement is a simple minuet in two parts in three sentences. The melody in the first sentence us A-D (I-IV) harmonies, making it gentle, lazy, rocking like a hammock. But Beethoven puts interesting harmonies still; he includes Gr6 (really just VIb7), E9 (V9), and G#dim9 (vii9) in the cadence. – Maybe I complicate things too much. Baroque and classical composers would sometimes play the base in the I chord while they would briefly play the melody in the V chord before soon resolving it, blurring harmonies to create poignant dissonance. Beethoven may simply be doing this but we should understand that it implies a vii7 or vii9 chord, the leading tone back to the I chord. – The second sentence in E7 gives a loud contrast to the minuet before slipping back into a quiet third sentence. The harmonies in this second part are simpler than those in the first.

The first variation (bars 17-32) embellishes the melody into arpeggios, changing their function to filling out harmonies, while the base becomes the new melody. Beethoven plays with the D3 base note and I-IV-I harmonies in these variations; for instance here the D4 base note implies E7 (V7), not IV. The note is the same but the harmonies are different. In the second variation (bars 33-48) the base now becomes full of arpeggios, the treble goes back to a simple song but Beethoven writes it for two voice parts. He also reverts back to A-D-A (I-IV-I).

The third variation (bars 49-64) has the arpeggios get even quicker, the note values get even smaller into tuplets of three. At the end of the first and third sentences, Beethoven sharpens ever second note of each tuplet, similar to a tactic he used in the first movement. Harmonies remain the same. The fourth variation (bars 65-80) squeeze note values even smaller to thirty-second notes. Now Beethoven implies E7 each time he plays D in the base.

Beethoven rests in Am in the oasis that is the fifth variation (bars 81-96). Beethoven reverts back to a simple melody but now he syncopates it with the base while at later points he plays sixteenth notes with sharpened accidentals. Harmonies remain the same. In this manner Beethoven is still able to develop material and hold interest as to not merely repeat the theme in Dm. The sixth and final variation (97-112) has tuplets of eight notes as the melody. Composers of the period would sometimes end their variations by playing the theme again or playing a final variation where little of the theme is altered. Beethoven takes the latter route, developing material while still keeping the music friendly and gentle. He starts the coda (bars 113-120) on a deceptive cadence in F#m (vi), a different and more poignant way of ending the last variation, before smoothly rounding it off.

THIRD MOVEMENT – SCHERZANDO, ALLEGRO MA NON TROPPO

The last movement is most playful and buoyant movement of the whole sonata but you should not be fooled. Beethoven still has a few tricks up his sleeves, a little more wit to spare for our humanist. It is no walk in the park. The word “scherzando” roughly translates to “little joke” but you should not be fooled by the title. The movement is in sonata form, not in the ternary form of a scherzo or minuet. Haydn and Mozart made plenty of musical jokes in their career. Haydn’s method was to start a work with a closing statement, making the listener think the piece was already over. Mozart mocked bad composers and performers in “Some Musical Fun” by exaggerating the dullness of boring melodies and the dissonant sounds of wrong notes. Beethoven made jokes out of harmony throughout his career, as you will see in this movement.

We begin the exposition. Part of Beethoven’s humor in the main subject (bars 1-17) means jumping the melody up and down a sixth and octave while briefly jumping to B7, a rather remote key. The transition (bars 18-36) has a very long sentence; its rapid augmented sixteenth notes are funny like someone getting a little too ahead of himself. Beethoven modulates by quickly jumping to A and simply playing A-E-A (I-V-I) a lot, but he splatters some Bm(vi) and B7(VI7) to spice up the harmony a bit and to recall that funny B note.

Beethoven designs the subordinate subject (bars 37-52) to have two contrasting sentences, one exuberant the other grounded. He rushes with rising arpeggios in the first sentence while he swoops low with a M2 treble and humming base in the second sentence. As part of his joke, Beethoven gives each sentence the “wrong” harmonies. He gives A-D (I-IV) harmonies, the quieting subdominant, to the gay first sentence while he gives A-E7 (I-V7) to the quieter sentence. He even plays a prank in the closing statement (bars 53-58) by using A-D (I-IV). It’s as if the piece doesn’t want to move to a new key and you’re trying to move it as if dragging Homer Simpson away from the couch. Beethoven creates humor in the second half of the exposition by misplacing harmonies and keeping the texture light and transparent, even by “Kurfursten” sonata standards.

The development (bars 59-70) is hardly anything at all. Even the harmonies are stale, mostly A-D (I-IV), only briefly in Dm. Beethoven makes light of our expectations. We heard a terrific development in the first movement and listeners in Beethoven’s time expected a darkening of mood or some new harmony, so we have the right to expect at least something. But the young Beethoven laughs, “It’s nothing!” and so we move to the recapitulation.

The main subject (bars 71-86) repeats with no change. The “transition” (bars 86-89) can hardly be called any such thing. We expect something similar to the exposition, some emphasis on the IV chord or subdominant, yes, but at least something substantial. Beethoven again spurns us. He cuts straight to G without any fluff, and even makes it the key of his subordinate subject (bars 90-110), which he makes long by playing it in three variations. The first uses trills, the second gives the base the melody, the third gives the treble the melody. Now we can see Beethoven’s comic scheme; he puts all the development on the subordinate subject, the one part of sonata form we often think to be the most placid and uneventful.

He also expands the closing section (bars 114-129) into a long-winded sentence. In essence, he transplants the transition to the end of the sonata, highlighting the closing section, a piece of music most composers rushed off to end a piece. He “misplaces” harmonies here too. In the exposition Bm (vi/D) was an important punch line so we expect to be back but Beethoven replaces it with F# (V/Bm) instead. It is the vi chord of A, which Beethoven uses to suspend the music a bit. The closing section is done but the piece has yet to end. Enter the coda (bars 129-160); Beethoven plays the main subject one more time, one more little joke, then ends the piece in a long-winded flurry of sixteenth notes. Thus Beethoven ends the Kurfursten sonatas on a high note.

 

Beethoven Analysis – Piano Sonata in Fm (WoO 47)

800px-Thirteen-year-old_Beethoven

MOVEMENT ONE – LARGHETTO MAESTOSO, ALLEGRO ASSAI

Beethoven, when making his second attempt to compose a piano sonata, wrote a more difficult and serious piece of music than he did when writing his first sonata. It is in the dark key of Fm, maybe the darkest key in classical music, has more complex harmonies, and has a denser harmonic structure. In this piece, Beethoven’s emotions are darker and more passionate in the minor first and second movement yet more pensive in the second movement in the middle. The second movement has a sublime quality we don’t hear in the earlier Eb sonata.

Yet, as I examine and play the sonatas of the mature Beethoven, I become shocked at how simply the preteen Beethoven wrote his early music in comparison. He still writes for two parts in most places, abuses the Alberti base, and uses the simple thin textures of octaves. Still, keep in mind that Beethoven was already a prodigy at twelve who could compete with most composers of the day three times his age. This sonata holds much promise for the young Beethoven, a promise he fulfilled in his later years.

All movements in this sonata are in sonata form. Click on the roadmap below to expand it. To hear the complete sonata with all annotations go to this link:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1qioHA4HeXw&t=317s

Scan Form ii

The exposition; the introduction (bars 1-9) is made of two contrasting sentences. The first sentence is a typical statement of slow introductions during that time, the first phrase goes from Fm to C, the next statement returns from C to F. He contrasts a heavy loud cord and dotted rhythm with soft legatos. The orchestration is not obvious but you can hear it; a loud tutti announcement followed by a soft string quartet. This beginning is important because we see Beethoven using music as a tool of speech and rhetoric, not just a way to string melodies together, which suggests that Beethoven will be able to build his ideas together, to create an argument or thesis if you will.

The second sentence develops the ideas of the first; he transforms the descend by 2nd into rising octaves, rising from F to Gb to A to Bb. Meanwhile he uses the Alberti base but in the base register, especially on the downbeat by striking the lowest notes on the pianoforte’s range. The bottom register sounds like a contrabassoon and base, especially on a pianoforte where the lower register is raspier. But more important, the rising line in the treble gives a slow, creeping, crawling feeling, a device Beethoven used a lot in his music to raise tension before releasing it. Beethoven also uses more inventive harmonies, like Gb (the Neopolitan major), then mutates it to Gbdim. And finally, he suspends the music on a C chord (V/Fm) with a C note as the base (the 5th or dominant note of Fm).

All this dense and detailed music at last done with, we move to the exposition proper. The main subject and transition (bars 10-17) are fused into one sentence and proceeds as thus; first the melody flies up two octaves in Fm as a Mannheim rocket, a tool Beethoven used a lot in his early career, inherited from Haydn and Mozart, and representing drama and angst. Then the melody descends in 3rds from Fm to Db to Bbm, a technique Beethoven recycled from his Eb sonata. I don’t blame him since using it takes you to a relative key so easily while using diverse harmonies.

The subordinate subject (bars 18-27) is in Ab, a typical key a composer would land on in a piece in Fm. The construction is very simple here; not one long intense passage but a contrast between a loud descend on the Ab chord and a soft rise on Eb. The closing theme (bars 28-36) feels a little forced but it is remarkable. The cello base descends down by 3rds (notes Ab, F, Db), something that fascinated Beethoven in his career.

The development (bars 37-46) is short and simple. In the first sentence, Beethoven imitates the Mannheim rocket but in Ab. The second sentence, the meat of the development, is new material not based on anything before it; alternates from chords to arpeggios and likewise alternates from Fm to Bbm. These are somewhat imaginative harmonies, as Beethoven mutates the home key and plays I-iv chords, not something too expected. And finally he suspends the piece with two chords on F.

He enters the recapitulation; the introduction here is very different from before, which is important as it shows how Beethoven adds new ideas to old material. It allows us to glimpse at how the mature Beethoven transforms the material he works with; he digs ever deeper into it, explores its potential, plays with it, changes it in all sorts of ways. He creates music that is different at the end of a peace or movement than before, making it feel like you went on a long journey and changed along the way. Of course you didn’t go anywhere. Beethoven was manipulating your mind all along, something he gets very skilled at over the years.

The introduction (bars 47-56); the first sentence changes harmonies a bit, Fm-F unlike before, which was Fm-C. It’s small but it takes the harmony down a 4th, giving a IV chord or subdominant like effect. The second sentence is very different; very loud rising arpeggios, important since this is material taken from the development section and expanded. Beethoven plays around with harmonies; he mutates the keys of Bb and Eb. He turns Bbm to Bb7 and Eb to Edim7. It doesn’t seem like much, but remember how he turned Gb to Gbdim? He’s doing it again but with more keys.

Beethoven plays recapitulation, almost exactly the same as the exposition, but with some differences in range and timbre he uses to create a darker sound to the music. The main subject (bars 57-64) is the same as before. The subordinate subject (bars 65-74), now in Fm, has the base and treble spread out by two octaves to create a more intense effect, then has phrases low in the tenor (viola) and base (cello and base) to create a darker feel. The closing statements (bars 75-83) have little change, the base only a m3rd lower than before.

MOVEMENT TWO – ANDANTE

The second movement shows the young Beethoven at his best on the piano; it has a certain sublime quality he achieves by doing three things. He uses ambiguous harmonies and rhythms, especially in the subordinate subject, he uses richer and more varied textures as opposed to octaves, and he writes for the key of Ab. Composers at Beethoven’s time thought each key had a special character best used to reflect certain moods and states of mind. The key of Ab had an eerie sound that made listeners pensive and sensitive to sublime thoughts, especially back in the day when performers used mean tuning to tune their instruments; the further a key was from C the more dissonant it sounded.

You could say classical music is based on the I and V chord (kind of how jazz is rooted in the I and IV chord), and composers use such a base to build a structure of building tension in the V chord and then resolving it in the I chord. Of course composers write in many remote keys in a work but the work, in the end, hangs on creating a I-V tension and resolving it. Beethoven turns this idea on its head during his middle and late period, like building a Eb-B tension in the “Emperor” concerto and a Bb-B tension in the “Hammerklavier” sonata, but that is many years from now. The young Beethoven suspends tension in this movement by not resolving in perfect or authentic cadences, allowing him to expand his ideas since he can avoid resolving them so soon.

I found this movement the most difficult to analyze out of all movements in these “Kurfursten” sonatas, leading to many mistakes in my annotation, which forced me to remake the YouTube video on this sonata.

The exposition; the main subject (bars 1-8), using 3rds to great effect while the base uses good counterpoint by rising by steps as the melody falls and having the melody an octave higher and with more sixteenth notes in the second phrase to heighten the emotion. The transition is made of two sentences; the first sentence (bars 8-16) expands on the main subject by having the melody, made songlike by its 3rds and 6ths, end in cadence that don’t resolve the music. Furthermore, in each cadence Beethoven uses Ab as the base to blur harmonies. It makes you wonder if Beethoven is really implying Eb7 with an Ab note thrown in or Bbm7. It would seem like an Eb7 but in the second sentence (bars 19-22) Beethoven mutates it to Bb so he can modulate to Eb with a Bb-Eb harmonies, which implies Bbm7.

The subordinate subject (bars 23-31) is the most special line in the entire sonata it starts on the wrong harmony. The first sentences starts in Fm in all places but then goes through many Bb7-Eb harmonies to imply Eb. The melody keeps climbing up the scale from the D note to the Ab note, then falls to a low F note, an imperfect cadence. The second sentence rising in dynamic and pitch up the scale to Bb, again suspending the music in Bb, the V chord. Beethoven is taking great pains to suspend tension as long as he can, something he didn’t do so well in the Eb sonata, and finally lands on Eb in the closing section (bars 35-40). He even uses three voices when closing, something a little new.

Beethoven divides the development into two pre-cores and two cores and uses it to replaces the main theme and transition in the recapitulation. The first pre-core (bars 40-44) mimics the main subject but in the harmonies of C7-Db and reverses the melodic arc from descending to rising. The core itself (bars 44-48) is in Fm, with a simple, sad, songlike melody rising and falling with a C note humming in the alto register. Beethoven purposefully makes the note C because it is the 5th note or dominant of Fm; by implying such he keeps tension and lets him play almost any melody without fear of dissonance.

The second pre-core (bars 49-54) acts as a “resting point”. Beethoven lingers in Edim7 (vii7/F), the leading tone to F, and constructs it in such a way to keep tension. He keeps most of it in Edim7, uses arpeggios to build up to a striking, loud syncopated section, and climaxes by keeping the music suspended briefly. Beethoven takes a syncopated section in the exposition as material and, while he doesn’t alter or expand it, he uses it for a different purpose. Then Beethoven resolves to the core, but lands on F, not Fm, like we expect.

The second core (bars 55-60) is pretty simple as Beethoven just plays thirty-second notes over an octave base. He concerns himself with returning to Ab. The base goes down the circle of fifths, from F, Bb, Eb, and Ab. The harmony implied by the thrity-second notes is not so simple as that Eb base is really part of a Gdim harmony. In the end, Beethoven makes an Eb-Ab-Eb cadence, ending with the base on the Eb, the dominant. Now on Eb, Beethoven plays the retransition (bars 61-64) like he played the transition before, serving the same function, just a 4th lower in harmonies. The subordinate subject (bars 65-76) and closing statement (bars 77-85) of the recapitulation change little, only a 4th lower in harmonies.

MOVEMENT THREE – PRESTO

The third movement is rapid and lighter in substance than the first movement but is still complicated in structure. The main subject (bars 1-32) comes in two sentences and it is the first time we see Beethoven develop a main theme by playing a variation of it. He approaches the main subject in later sonatas as well, such as the “Waldstein” and “Appasionata” but with far more invention. In this sonata, he changes the melody little and uses the Alberti base yet again, but the changed material still does its job to heighten the angst. But Beethoven does use some interesting harmonies. The very first bar of the main theme starts out in F but then mutates back to Fm and he makes use of the C9 (V9) harmony. It sounds like Gdim in the first sentence but later in the second sentence the Alberti base gives you context, letting you hear its true design.

The exposition; the main subject is also the transition, easily landing to the subordinate subjects. The first subordinate subject (bars 33-44) is in Eb7 and ends in a IV-I cadence, which is interesting because most composers would land on Ab instead. While Beethoven does land a 5th higher on Eb he makes it Eb7 and uses Ab to create a IV-I effect, suggesting he may move to Ab. The second subordinate subject (bars 45-59) makes the Eb7-Ab harmonies more obvious by using loud octaves in the base and arpeggios in the treble. The closing statements (bars 60-74) are also odd; he spends some time in Ab7 and Db, but finally lands on Ab. Beethoven delays modulation to the “proper” key.

The development and retransition fused together (bars 75-84) is extremely short. It’s even shorter than the main subject, and it does disappoint me a little as Beethoven could have at least played it again as a variation. Either way, Beethoven mutates the home key of Fm to F while developing the material a bit; he uses new keys like Gb (the Neopolitan or IIb) and Bbm (iv). He does develop the melodic arc as well by making it rise higher and more often. He dips the melody down a bit before rising it; he raises it Gb, then to Db, and landing it on C just a m2nd away.

The recapitulation; the first subordinate subject (bars 85-101) is a little more complex, dividing amongst the Fm-C7 harmonies, and uses the chromatic base of Bh to make a leading tone of Edim9 lead to Fm, but then makes an imperfect cadence in C to keep the tension high. The second subordinate subject (bars 97-112) is much simpler, arpeggios in C7 and Fm. The closing section (bars 112-126) has little change, just dropped by a m3rd to put the key in Fm. The very last notes are important though, as Beethoven throws all parts down to the lowest register to create a downward, tragic finale. He later replicates this ending in the Op. 2 and “Appasionata” Fm sonatas but to greater effect. Even now Beethoven seems aware the very lowest note on the pianoforte is an F note (the lowest note on the modern piano is an A note). It possibly represents a darkest, lowest point in music, in feeling and literally in tone with the pianoforte. Beethoven doesn’t find lower points in feeling or transcend them until his last piano sonatas.

 

Beethoven Piano Sonatas – Road Map

sonata-scan

Before I get down to analyzing all the Beethoven sonatas I wish to explain the many forms Beethoven and other composers used when writing music. I drew a guide to the four most common forms used at the time, which is the headline picture of this blog post.

I would like to emphasize a disclaimer beforehand. Sonata forms and other musical forms were not set in stone. They were not a rulebook but trends composers tended to follow when writing music, and it was not uncommon for composers such as Beethoven to toy around with the forms’ conventions and people’s expectations. You will hear plenty of examples from Beethoven in almost all of his sonatas, even in his early “Kurfursten” sonatas he wrote when he was only twelve.

SONATA FORM is the most complex form out there with only fugues being harder to write. Most professors say sonata form is in “ternary form” or is made of three parts but this is not true. Sonata form is really in “binary form” or made of two main parts. Professors mislabel the development section as a third part of the sonata but it really isn’t, just a space to improvise, as I will show below.

Sonata form’s two parts are the exposition (an “A part”) and recapitulation (B part). Both are basically the same, divided into two smaller parts where you start with a subject (or a distinct musical idea) and follow up on it with more ideas. The exposition has a first half (or “a part”) where you begin the piece with a main subject that will be the main idea of the entire movement in the home key. The example home keys I use here will be C major and c minor (I or i key).

After stating your main subject you enter into a transition; you develop your idea while moving (or modulating) to a new key. If your home key is C major you usually modulate to G major (V key) or if your home key is c minor you usually modulate to Eb major (III key). Often a composer will do a few V-I cadences in the new key at the end of the transition to let the listener settle into a new key. If you started the piece in C major you will now be playing D major – G major cadences or if you started the piece in c minor you will now be playing Bb major – Eb major cadences.

Now you are in the second half (or b part) of the exposition; you play a second subject, sometimes more, usually to contrast with your main subject. These new subjects are sometimes called subordinate subjects. Then you follow up with some closing statements where you cement the piece in your new key. In our example it’s G major or Eb major.

Now you enter into a development section where you take the different subjects you played before and explore them in many different keys, usually far away from your home key. Often the development is divided into three smaller parts. First is a “pre-development” part where you start this new phase of the music. Then you play one or more “cores” where you play a musical idea in many different keys. Then you play a re-transition where you go back to the home key. This begins the recapitulation.

The recapitulation (or B part) is very similar to the exposition. You play your main subject, (a’ part) which is in C major or c minor in our example, and enter a transition, except here you don’t go to a new key but stay in your old key. You even do a few V-I cadences in your old key to let the listener know you’re staying there. So in your subordinate subjects (b’ part) if you started the piece in C major you make a G major – C major cadence. If you started the piece in c minor you make a G major – c minor cadence or a G major – C major cadence. Then you conclude the piece with some closing statements in that same key.

Rarely is the recapitulation exactly like the exposition, especially when a skilled composer is writing this music. You will play the main subject a little differently; maybe even develop it even further. While in the transition you may linger in the IV key. You may even play the subordinate subjects a little differently and you may expand on the closing statements to give the piece a strong ending.

It is not uncommon to think sonata form (and other forms) as a debate or thesis since even composers of the day saw this kind of music as very intellectual. The various subjects are like the main points you make in an argument and the various transitions and closing statements are like the train of thought of logical statements and examples you bring up to support your ideas in greater detail.

You can think of sonata form as a story or character arc just as easily. Your character starts out in the main subject and dramatically changes during transitions. Subordinate subjects are like resting places for your character between adventures or a place to reflect how your character has changed. The development is like the lowest point in a character’s life or the area of greatest struggle while the closing statements at the end of the piece is like the climax of the story.

I now argue why sonata form is a binary form of two parts and not a ternary form of three parts. This is because the development section isn’t really a part in its own right, more like a free space to explore your musical ideas however you wish. It even grew over time. In Scarlatti’s and Mozart’s earlier sonatas, and even the younger Beethoven’s sonatas, the development is small to the point where the entire second half of the sonata (development and recapitulation) is repeated. But when you get to Mozart’s later works and most of Beethoven’s works throughout his career, the development section gets so big it’s almost as big as the recapitulation at times, and the second half of the sonata is no longer repeated. But even at this point the development is not a formal third part of the sonata, which is still, in essence, a creature of two halves. Some sonatas even lack a development section.

I must also point out how earlier sonatas, like Scarlatti’s and the teenage Beethoven’s, don’t have definite subjects like later sonatas do. What you get instead is a stream of different musical phrases, like sentences or stanzas, that travels to different keys.  You can still hear definite A parts and B parts but not so much definite subjects.

MINUET FORM is far simpler than sonata form but still has a structure to it. Unlike sonata form, minuet form is an actual ternary form since it has three parts with similar structure. You have the minuet (A part), a trio (B part), and return to the minuet (A’ part). Scherzos are quicker and livelier than minuets but are no different in basic structure.

The minuet is divided into two halves. The first half (a part) is where you state the main ideas of your minuet in the home key, and is often brief. Our example will again be C major or c minor. Then you enter a so-called development (or b part) where you explore the music in different keys for a while, then your return to your home key. Sometimes the minuet ends like it began but a little differently (with a’ part) while at other times the end is completely new (a c part).

The trio is also divided into two halves but is at a different key. If you began the minuet in C major you will often begin the trio in G major (V key) or F major (IV key). Sometimes you may even begin the trio in c minor (i key). If you began the minuet in c minor you will often begin the trio in C major (I key). Other than difference in key the trio contrasts the minuet, but otherwise has the same structure as the minuet.

Then you return to the minuet (A’ part), which may be slightly different than it was before and may even have a coda at the end. Keep in mind that Beethoven sometimes plays the scherzo and then the trio more than once like in his Symphony No. 7 but this is rare.

RONDO FORM is another simpler form of music, and is easiest to compare with a poem or song that frequently refrains to its main idea. You often get different lines, often repeated, in different keys. For instance you get the main line of the rondo (a part) in the home key, then a different line in a different key (b part) and a different line in yet another key (c part). All these different lines, like stanzas in a poem, can be put into a group (or A part). Then the next group of lines (or B part) begins. You play a variant of the old lines (like a b’ part or c’ part) or play new ideas (d part or e part), but you will always refrain to your first line (a part). You proceed in this pattern until you play the first line one final time, then play a small coda to end the piece.

VARIATION FORM is the simplest form but can also be the most profound music as it allows the composer to explore an idea as deeply as he wants. Beethoven himself used variations to great affect, especially later in his career, and would often play variations of ideas in other forms.

Variations tend to stay in one key throughout, with the theme divided into two halves that repeat. The first half is the main subject of the variation in the home key (a part). The second half has a small so-called development that explores the subject a bit (b key) and then returns to the subject (a’ part), which may be slightly different this time. Each variation that follows has the same basic structure; often it even has the exact same harmonies as the theme.

But even variations can change. Sometimes a composer will play a variation in the minor version of the home key (like c minor to contrast C major). Many variations in the 18th and 19th centuries tend to have a similar structure. The first few variations embellish the theme with more and more notes. After a certain point you play one or more simpler slower variations in a contrasting key. Then you play the last variations in the home key again.

Professor Peternes Proposes a Toast

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NATIONAL EDUCATION CONFERENCE
Presided by the American Enterprise Institute, the Heritage Foundation, the CATO Institute, the Heartland Institute, Prager University, Trump University, and the RAND Corporation.
Inaugural presidential speech delivered by Proff. Jack B. Peternes.
June 6, 2016

PETERNES: Firstly, I would like to thank the Grand Inquisitor Newt Gingrich for electing me president of the National Education Alliance, our conglomerate private enterprise that monitors the progress made by various think tanks in our great nation. This is a most auspicious of occasions, as my presidency and a new plan to educate the youth of the United States is more needed more direly than ever. The leftist menace raises her ugly head more than ever; our youth have abandoned the family, God, and the Nation for the slavery of big government and socialist values. They see the just authority and traditions of our great nation as cultural and political deceits from a wealthy party of corporate elites who wish to chain the nation with the forces of the economy, the police, and information. Now they cause us a terrible fright – the specter of communism haunts America – threatening to tear western civilization asunder.

Communism has become a radical insurgency in the United States since the 1960s. Communist professors have infected our universities, which in turn bred communist youth who have infected every part of our American way of life, breeding ever more communists; their goal is nothing less than to turn all of America red, burdened under the yoke of a single, unquestionable, oppressive ideology. Who may now doubt or slander the American hero McCarthy for his prophesies, now coming to fruition? The wisest and greatest of business elites of older times knew the value of God, the family, and private enterprise, as seen in the thriving kingdoms of Hitler and Mussolini. While the mob rule of democracy prevents our wise business elites from driving decadence out by force there is still hope yet as we may inculcate the youth with the future with proper values so they may, in due time, take back the nation; to rescue the West from feminists, union workers, thugs, hippies, immigrants, socialists, anarchists, communists, globalists, vagabonds, school teachers, university professors, artists, philosophers, sexual deviants, cucks, purple-haired social justice warriors, liberals, and other degenerates.

I dropped from university as a youth because nothing could interest me less than paying tens of thousands more dollars to cultural Marxists who will tell me to read books I have already read and formulate subjective opinions they happen to agree with, only for me to age and watch all of my knowledge pass out of trend. No professor, despite his years of education and research, could withstand the power of the red pill, for even as a youth I knew my opinions, my truth bombs, were self-evident facts. I shun any child foolish enough to pay the liberal fascists in charge to indoctrinate them with false facts, transforming them into an army of politically correct drones that follow big government without question. Indeed, I disavowed my daughter for even asking to go to university. I would not suffer to have my white, teenaged, comely daughter turn into a fat, ugly feminist who violates her sacred body with pills each time she beds a thug and murders countless innocent infant lives. Father always knows best. One must not question their father or God, for that is how Adam and Eve ate the forbidden fruit, plunging mankind into sin.

The entire school of modern leftism rests on two quotes:

“Political language is designed to make lies sound truthful and murder respectable.” – George Orwell

“Accuse the other side of that which you are guilty.” – Joseph Goebbels

Let us then, as new educational authorities of our great nation, prevent the youth from eating the forbidden fruit ever again. We must begin a new nationwide program to recolonize the minds of Americans, to educate the youth of America for decades to come. In this post-Orwellian post-truth world we must take great care to protect the youth from the false facts of leftist socialist public education, communist universities, and the liberal media. In the place of false facts we must build our education program on alternative facts. – We are the greatest nation on earth, home to the freest people of the world. We have the right to disagree with the facts! – To that end, we must…

1. Dismantle all public schools. All education will be privatized.
2. Remodel all remaining schools after the Prussian Education System.
3. Cut school curriculum of all social sciences, arts, humanities, and philosophy.
4. Ban the buying, selling, or reading of all books beyond any reading that is strictly technical and necessary to acquire wealth.
5. Privatize all scientific research so we may monitor scientists, most of whom are leftist and godless, from spreading propaganda such as global warming.
6. Necessitate that all our pedagogues and politicos speak and write in an obscure, verbose, domineering way, especially when expounding alternative facts. Such ways of talking make it abundantly clear who is truly knowledgeable and smart and who is not.
7. Forbid the playing of all music. Music foments the minds of youth with wild imagination and godless decadence. Furthermore, music is a coded language leftists use to sneak in subversive ideas.

The defenseless rich, too often victimized by the mob, their enterprises too often foiled by government restraints implanted by cucks bullied into submission by union workers and feminists; we must stand firm and take back western civilization from the New World Order of liberal fascism.

POLITICS:
More than ever we must educate the young in current events, including the teaching of alternative facts. The situation of the modern world is as follows: the world is under a radical leftist insurgency, which aims at the destruction of all political opposition and freedom of thought, utilizing many branches of corruption to reach such a goal: including hateful atheists to persecute Christians and destroy the First Amendment, militant Muslims to invade western civilization from without, the liberal media, educators, and activists eroding western civilization from within, government-sponsored feminist tribunals to persecuting white males, and globalists to obliterate all national pride and heritage. The end goal of liberal fascism is to purge western civilization of all white males by exterminating them in FEMA concentration camps. Once that is achieved, the world will be heaven on earth to the left, a world without any difference or discrimination of any sort, a world where all humans will look the same, think the same, act the same, mired forever in perpetual mediocrity, a world where creative genius, artistic beauty, strength of character, and infinite potential, as embodied highest in the white male, is gone forever.

Let us strain some alternative facts more strongly than others, a litmus test every proper youth must memorize by heart, to counter cultural Marxist dogma. Corporations, the free market, and the police are not the enemies of the people. Rather, the people are their own biggest enemies. Protestors, and other people roused to action against injustice, are violent, thuggish criminals who destroy millions of dollars in property. They are weak, effeminate crybabies who call anyone they disagree with a racist, unable to muster the courage for real, physical action. Such destructive calamity causes great concern to our esteemed business elites as they retire to their mansions, penthouses, and yachts. Our wise leaders understand the people must be saved from their worst instincts; for as the people are pampered with socialist safety nets such as union workers, healthcare, welfare, and other favors delivered to them on a silver platter, they become spoiled, lazy, insolent. They clamor for the truth and demand their rights, causing a dreadful stir, plunging western civilization into the deepest decline.

We must correct the people of their raucous behavior by reminding them that the free market is an enterprise of equal exchange by all parties, that privatization keeps the mob of communist anarcho-fascists from subjugating the people in an oppressive monopoly. The people must realize that not everyone is a winner in a fair system. There will be losers, and nobody likes losers. Gumption makes a great man. How often do we see a nobleman rise to great wealth armed with nothing but his wits and courage to make a daring enterprise, and contrast this to the poor man, who fails at everything despite big government delivering him all advantages on a silver platter since birth! Likewise, we must remind the people how foreigners, especially Muslims, hate us for our freedom, want nothing more than kill us in the name of Allah, transform our churches into mosques, and subjugate our women under Islamic dogma instead of under Christian dogma. To that end we must forever be at war to keep our eight hundred military bases intact abroad seventy countries around the world to protect our shores from foreign invasion. War creates peace, yet we must forever be at war, so it is ultimately true that war is peace. Only a corporate dictatorship can save western civilization.

HISTORY:
More than any other subject on earth history is about us. Therefore, we must educate the youth in these alternative facts with the most severity. Those who forget the past are condemned to repeat it – and the eleventh grade – and we must ensure the youth never fall into degeneracy and revolution again. Professor James W. Lowen is most esteemed among the left for his propagandist book Lies My Teacher Told Me, a dangerous book whose author indoctrinated countless impressionable youth into hating America. In that regard, Professor Lowen is similar in character to the diabolical Professor Noam Chomsky, another leftist wicked ideologue. To remedy our national disease I appoint Ms. Betsy DeVos to manage the publication and distribution of our corrective volume, Lies My Marxist Professor Told Me. Yes, Ms. DeVos is a woman and has limited experience teaching, but she knows American history better than anyone else. The following alternative facts I disseminate to you are only a portion of the curriculum we devised.

Firstly, let us deal straightaway with insipid humdrum that the white man did not discover America. Yes, we hear socialist scientists speak of Ice Age and Viking settlers before the hero Columbus, but did they have rights to the land? The Indians did not claim the land in any way, did not seize its resources to build chains of shopping malls and fast food restaurants, living like untamed animals in caves. How can you claim to have any rights to land when you do not have any conception of property rights? Any white person who civilizes the land and its people have the right to take over the continent.

Let us also dispel the slander that our founding fathers were mass murderers, which is similar to the ways liberal fascists lie about the conflict of Israel and Palestine. The white man came to American shores in peace, providing the Indians with food, blankets, and civilization, only to have the ingrate Indians rise like jihadists to kill him. The white man defends himself with his superior weapons, civilization, and intellect, forcing the savages to fall back. The white man pushes civilization to new frontiers as naturally expected, only for the Indian to return. He tries to kill the white man and loses once more, then dares to cry oppression. The Indian’s weakness to European diseases only proves his weak constitution all the more.

Liberal Marxist academia deals with slavery just as dishonestly. Even they admit blacks in Africa sold men of their own kind as slaves to the white man, but they lie everywhere else. Slavery was nowhere near as brutal as bleating leftists and civil rights activists claim. That is fact. The master of the house gave slaves all the benefits enjoyed by a free poor white man. He gave him work, food, shelter, and, most of all, discipline. Yet how does this blackamoor repay his generous master? He slacks off, he lies, he steals, he joins forces with poor whites to stage an insurrection against man and God. Abraham Lincoln, the worst president in American history, freed the slaves in a catastrophic blunder, tricked by globalists into believing the South fought the Civil War to keep slaves. The South fought the Civil War for states’ rights, not for slavery! In either case, Lincoln released a race of people forever cast in a victim complex while displaying the worst viciousness of all demographics in America.

The next century would fall prey to the machinations of the communist ideology. As capitalism emerged and honest tycoons and bankers pursued profit under the Non-Aggression Principle and the free market, poor workers and lazy intellectuals, all resentful, envious, greedy, stupid, created the wicked ideology of communism. The helmsman of the red menace, the infernal Karl Marx, is second only to Satan in his deceit and malignance. Communists hence wrecked havoc on the world by causing two world wars to the destruction of billion of dollars in property. In particular, Stalin manipulated America and Britain to fight against Nazi Germany, the last bastion of Western tradition and life-affirmation, to the set stage for global communist rule. Stalin died, yet his disciplines carried his schemes, manipulating college students in the 1960s. This created a wave of radical insurgents from genocidal feminist Gloria Steinem to the radical Muslim Martin Luther King, all aiming to destroy western civilization from within. We arrive to the present where America’s youth, the people of the future, must take their country back from the forces of Marxist darkness.

THE EQUALITY QUESTION:
Now we turn to the thorny questions on race and gender, the alternative facts, which leftist ideologues have fought for decades to mislead the public. Cultural Marxists and other postmodern degenerates will balk at the study of physiology and phrenology though they are perfectly legitimate sciences as opposed to, let us say, sociology and gender studies. Under a proper inspection it is quite obvious the black is distinctly inferior to the white, as different to the white man as chimpanzee is to man. One must only look at a black man’s stubbed face, his broad nose, his flaring nostrils to the see the apish resemblance and come to an immediate conclusion. Nevertheless, generous white scientists – can black scientists, if such things can even exist, be impartial? – such as Doctor Philippe Rushton and Professor Charles Murray have examined the Negro question in depth only to arrive to the same conclusion. Doctor Rushton, by studying Playboy and other pornographic magazines, concluded that there is an inverse correlation between penis size and intelligence. Professor Murray published the Bell Curve, a landmark text so infallible all other literature must be discarded if one is to honestly understand race relations.

Likewise with sex the screeching feminists will be equally disappointed as their thuggish civil rights activist brothers. The female is decidedly inferior to the male in stature and intellect, the difference between her and man similar to the unbridgeable gap between chimpanzee and man. Once more, the practice of the true sciences physiology and phrenology provide insights into the nature of woman. Her body is smaller and weaker than man’s, her shoulders and chest narrow, her eyes too large, her hips too wide, her legs short and crooked, her breasts sagging flabs of fat. Her vagina stinks a most noxious odor and bleeds… The woman is foulest in childbirth, sweating, smelly, her vagina torn and bleeding, her butt smeared with shit… Women are less able to do mental tasks than men are, especially math and logic. Her behavior is far worse as she always seeks a sugar daddy to provide for her. Once that sugar daddy was a good man and father to her children, now the sugar daddy is big government; the woman now serves this new “man”, she is a complete welfare queen. Now she snubs all good men, riding the cock carousel until the age of twenty five when she loses her beauty forever. Only then does the arrogant slut condescend to marry a poor beta male sap stupid enough to provide for her until his dying breath.

All males in the animal kingdom are divided into several categories, a trait that applies perfectly to humans as well, even though he be a creature of God and not a lowly beast. The alpha male is the highest of all men; he is a winner, he dominates every man and woman he meets and does with them what he wishes with no remorse or regard to their sensibilities. Thus the business elites are the brave and strong alpha males among us and rightly so. Next we see beta males, poor dorks who must bear all the brunt of the alpha male. Unable to compete with the alpha male, the beta male must make with whatever scraps the alpha male places for him, especially if it is a woman. The gamma male, the delta male, and the iota male are lower still and even more pathetic; the poor, union workers, and other degenerate losers are this sort of male. The omega male is the absolute lowest male on earth, the retard with Downs Syndrome and cerebral palsy. Beneath all these gradations of the white male is the black male, the white female, and black female. Among all females only the white, middle class, college educated, social justice warrior female is worth any degree of thought. All other females are nonpersons below anything higher than a cursory consideration.

As for so-called transgender people such things do not exist. There are only two genders. Transgender people are merely men and women mentally disturbed and confused. The same thing can also be said of gay and bisexual people. Governor Mike Pence recommends electroshock therapy as a cure for such mental disorders, a prescription I endorse wholeheartedly. I also insist all queer degenerates be forced to take religious instruction; further still to become priests and nuns so God, the church, and state may always watch them so they never deviate again. Overall, brutal hierarchy is man’s natural state, belonging to him long before civilization began and staying with him long afterward. Equality is a luxury created by wealth and weakness, a tolerance we can no longer abide. The time of communists’ failed experiment of equality is over.

THE SCIENCES
Perhaps you thought the hard scientists were free from cultural Marxist indoctrination. Perish the thought you fool! No science is safe from leftists and their destructive plots. Firstly, we must do away with all soft sciences: no philosophy, no sociology, no anthropology, no gender studies, no political science. Nothing is a social construct, least of all the Almighty God whose will we carry out here on earth. Social sciences degenerate youth by giving them terrible, corrupting ideas. They turn into hedonists, become spoiled, insolent, lazy, demanding their parents pay their tuition, whining about student loans. The degenerate wants big government to give him everything he wants on a silver platter and, when he does not recieve it, he protests on the street.

The arts, especially the liberal arts, lead just as many youth astray and likewise should be banned. The best knowledge, the only real knowledge, is pursued through the study of immediate, practical subjects such as economics, business, and law. Idleness is the Devil’s workshop. Knowledge for its own sake, let alone joy for knowledge, leads youth to perdition. All men with glasses are to be distrusted as such men read too many books, causing their vision to decay. The strong white male with healthy strong natural opinions becomes a spineless liberal intellectual who debilitates over the most obvious and self-evident truth with a woman’s self-decisiveness and deceit. The liberal intellectual finds what? Only false facts! If only the cuck would take his nose out of his book and look at the real world he would encounter alternative facts and see the truth.

Hard sciences get no pass for leftists poisoned even them with cultural Marxist false facts. First let me breach on the inherent degeneracy of science itself and why it must always be treated with suspicion. Not only does science take good men away from God it undermines the white male’s importance in the universe. During the time of Moses only a flat earth existed with Jerusalem at the center; there the white male was the center of all creation and the highest being second only to God. With Copernicus’ discovery of the heliocentric universe the earth demoted to another planet, and the white man’s role shrunk. Now we know the sun is merely one star among billions in one galaxy among trillions. Look how small the white male became. In the face of such overwhelming and distressing thoughts we must always remember the white male is center to God.

Therefore all sciences that undermine such a view should be discarded. Evolution is clearly a Darwinian hoax perpetuated by leftist liars. If man came from monkeys why are there still monkeys? Astronomy, which holds the earth to be anything but the center of the cosmos, must also be tossed out. Geology for holding the earth to be billions of years old? Out it goes. All are a liberal conspiracy. So what science do we use? Biblical science. We require all youth to read the Bible in school as a science textbook while we ourselves consult the Bible for all scientific truth. God revealed all his knowledge to us in Abraham and his descendants. Who are we as men to question God and suppose there be more knowledge than what God knows?

A few words on other sciences, not as critical but harmful nevertheless. Vaccines do cause autism, no matter what some crying liberal says. Many foolproof studies have established the fact. Pharmaceutical drugs have no effect on patients while only creating addictions. Let the patient seek a homeopathic remedy or pray to God to deliver him from his illness. Psychiatry and psychology is a globalist ploy to destroy the minds and independent thought of youth everywhere so they may be docile cows herded under the New World Order big government instead of docile sheep herded by the Shepherd. Abortion destroys women, causing them physical and psychological harm lasting throughout her life. Therefore, all abortion should be banned, even if the woman carries an ectopic pregnancy; for her abortion is murder and committing such a heinous act plunges her into Hell. Better die righteous and join the fetus with Jesus in Heaven.

CONCLUSION:
My speech finished, I raise a toast to God and country. With God as my witness I swear to uphold all American values and protect and serve the American people at all times. May God speed us on our righteous mission. May candidate Donald Trump become President of the United States of America so he may appoint Cabinet members, supreme judges, and other viziers who will implement our education program for the future citizens of the United States of America. May God bless America and her values of freedom, democracy, and equality, and guide us to a better and more secure future.

COX NEWS Reporting Live! Emperor Trump’s INAUGURATION!

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Magnus Cox reporting live.

Previously on Cox News we witnessed former Chancellor Sheev Palpatine’s Inaugural address as the first Emperor of the newly formed Galactic Empire. The Emperor Elect promised his citizens to unite of all the galaxy’s people, drain the swamp of corporate corruption, rebuild galactic industry, bring back their jobs, and purge the galaxy of criminals, terrorists, and political radicals. “Together, we will make the galaxy great again!” The Emperor declared in triumph to a thunderous applause from all senators and constituents.

Today we broadcast another inauguration day, this one from our homeworld Earth. I’m just in Washington D.C., the day is sunny and bright, the American people are gathered together in joy. This will be an auspicious day in American history. I see various clerics and businessmen shake hands, exchange mandatory pleasantries, accept deals. America is a business; someone of immense integrity and character must run such a large corporation and the one man fit for such an immense enterprise is Emperor Donald J. Trump, former King of New York.

The future President will franchise our nation as never before seen. I believe we may be witnessing a business rise similar to those of McDonald, Burger King, and Coca Cola. The free American people directly voted Trump as their corporate leader. After Mr. Trump’s inaugural address he will officially inherit all rights for The American People™, The White House Real Estate™, and Americorp.™, which, as I am told, he will convert into a privately owned national park as a curiosity for business owners and bankers abroad. Of course, Mr. Trump will share his wealth and power with an advisory board as well as business friends outside The White House Real Estate™ property.

Americorp.™ top attorney Rich Bling, Esq. directs the proceedings. Quoting the great enterpriser John Galt, he says, “Do not ask what you can do for your country. Ask what your country can do for you.” Mr. Blunt has just invited Bishop Recusant, Hierophant Skivvy, and Pharisee Cain to join us in our celebration of victory over democracy.

BISHOP RECUSANT: “Let us invoke Isaiah 45:7 from the Book of Wisdom, ‘I form the light, and create darkness: I make peace, and create evil: I the LORD do all these things.’ We must remember and acknowledge, once and for all, that we worship a God of evil. Our Lord thy God, through all his actions, has spoken of what creed we must follow. His actions are of selfishness, greed, hate, spite, jealousy, brutality, vengeance. As He commands Man to follow his decrees and walk the path of God, Man must obey.

“God created the universe and man in his likeness. Likewise, he created a universe of misery and created man with every vice in His soul. For proof, let us gaze at our citizens, at our great nation, and the world at large. We see crime reign everywhere; everywhere the evil men of our great nation flourish with more wealth than ever before while the weak dullards fools call good men struggle to not starve. God rewards man for his faith and diligence, so is it any surprise to see God reward evil men, his true believers?

“We were a nation of God and we will always be a nation of God. We need not look further than our great nations history to see that God has blessed us each step of the way for dutifully following his command. We killed savages as we pilgrimmed to American soil, and God gave us bountiful food. We enslaved niggers, and God gave us great wealth. Indeed, if savages and niggers repopulated, we the American people would kill and enslave them all over again so our evil God may reward us double our last boon. We pay workers abroad a pittance not even worthy for a homeless bum, and God gives us new toys and cars for our leisure. We destroy the homes and lives of infidels abroad, and God has given us sweet black gold; the blood of our great nation without which we could not survive.

“Let us pray. God of our ancestors, Lord of Vengeance, you have charged us to rule over all men and creatures produced by you to govern the world in crime and viciousness. Give us strength. We are your servants, ready to burn the entire world at the altar of your Son, the Golden Calf, but we are small and weak creatures. Therefore, give us derangement and cunning with your strength so we make most use of the short time we have on earth. Only we know your Will and what is pleasing in your eyes, what conforms to your commands. Dispatch Vice from your blooded throne, for she knows all things, and let her prudently guide us. Amen.”

HIEROPHANT SKIVVY: “From the gospel of Matthew the Fifth Chapter, ‘God blesses those who are rich for the kingdom of earth is theirs. God blesses the proud for they have inherited the earth. God blesses the vengeful for they reaped rewards from their strength. God blesses the violent and the persecutors, for they are the children and emissaries of God who do his bidding on Earth. And God blesses you, as His weak, self-righteous enemies annoy you and say all sorts of lies about your God. You are my followers; you are the sheep of my herd. A flame is not put in a basket. A flame is placed in a mansion to burn it down. In the same way, let your wicked deeds shine out for all to see.”

PHARISEE CAIN: “We come to you, Infernal Father, in the name of your Son, the Golden Calf, thanking you for this country that you have rewarded to your people. As we enter the end of an era, we acknowledge you blessing our great nation’s history with might and our future with vice. Americorp.™ is your gift to us, your most faithful followers. May you bless Emperor Donald J. Trump, his royal family, and his clients with the principles necessary to lead this great country to dominate the world for ten thousand years. As spoken in Provervs 21:1, ‘Our leader’s heart is in your hands.’ Reveal to our Emperor your Will to further join our great nation to your purpose. Thy Kingdom come, thy Will be done.”

The holy persons descend from the pulpit. Amateur singers from Missouristan State University sing praise to Americorp.™ for welcome all strangers. – Provided they’re white and follow the Will of our great nation and our God, of course. – A fine young woman, a “ten out of ten” as Emperor Trump would call her, gave a fine oral performance singing our National Anthem. Then all citizens rise to praise Americorp.™

Emperor Trump does not seem to be a man of the arts or much of a patriot as the rituals bore him, but he does take a small interest in the blonde who sung our anthem. After his inauguration the Emperor will grab her by the pussy for his amusement and his crowning celebration of his victory over the American people. At last, our Emperor rises to the podium to deliver his inauguration speech.

EMPEROR TRUMP: “I’m a great guy. I make great speeches. I make the best speeches. I am officially Emperor of Americorp.™ and you better believe it. Americorp.™ could be wonderful if it was run by smart people but we have people that are stupid. I like Republicans. I like Democrats. I like everyone. And everyone likes me. – Only Rosie O’ Donnell doesn’t like me. – Everyone likes me so much yesterday sold my apartment for $15 million to someone from China, but today is a moment for you, the people.

“I’m really rich; the richest, handsomest, most intelligent guy in Americorp.™, but not everyone is as rich as me. Too many moms on welfare drive Cadillacs to pick up free government checks. Too much education is making people stupid and trapped in debt. Too many rapist Mexican gangs bring drugs to my children and prep school kids to make an honest living. Too many thugs became lazy bums since my friends sold their jobs to China and are now destroying Chicago and Baltimore. We are a nation of losers. I don’t like losers. My grandparents did not come to America all the way from Germany to see it get taken by immigrants, hippies, and soccer moms. Not on my watch.

“My tiny hands will build a great wall across Mexico. They will bring back your jobs. Some people say since my hands are small my other thing is small. I guarantee you there is no problem. My dream will be your dream. My success will be your success. I will pay as little taxes as possible and, as I overflow with wealth, every penny that trickles down from Trump Tower will be made to benefit American workers and American families. I will protect our borders from the Chinamen making your products, the Jews stealing your money, and the Mexicans stealing your jobs. Nobody will be tougher on Mexicans and ISIS than Donald J. Trump

“The American Dream is dead, but I will bring it back, bigger and better and stronger. Together, we will make Americorp.™ proud again. We will make Americorp.™ white again. We will make Americorp.™ rich again. We will make Americorp.™ the king of the world again. And yes, together we will make Americorp.™ great again.”

Both patricians and plebeians rejoice the christening of their new leader. The Emperor smiles. He reaches down, grabs the blonde singer by the pussy. To my knowledge a Rabbi is set to speak after Emperor Trump but I just received news: all non-Christians are to be imprisoned in camps. May God bless us during these four long years.

Magnus Cox out.

Yugioh Eternal Duelist Soul: Disruption Deck

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Eternal Duelist Soul is one of my favorite Yugioh games and it embodies my favorite era of Yugioh. Fuck Pendulums, fuck Xyz, fuck Synchros, fuck E-Heros, fuck Chaos Control, fuck Yata. 2002 Yugioh is real Yugioh, and this oldfag is still going strong playing card games in a 2002 format. This deck is my favorite of all the decks I posted today but it is also risky and difficult to wield. You have to be careful not to destroy yourself with your own burn cards.

Monsters:
1x Witch of the Black Forrest
2x Sangan
1x Cyber Jar
2x Morphing Jar
2x Morphing Jar #2
2x Needle Worm
2x Spear Cretin
3x Magician of Faith
1x Sinister Serpent

Spells:
1x Dark Hole
1x Raigeki
2x Swords of Revealing Light
1x Harpies’ Feather Duster
2x Graceful Charity
1x Card Destruction
1x Pot of Greed
3x Gravekeeper’s Servant
3x Chain Energy
3x The Shallow Grave

Traps:
2x Magic Jammer
1x Mirror Force
1x Imperial Order
3x Skull Invitation
1x Ring of Destruction
1x Magic Cylinder

Yugioh Eternal Duelist Soul: Discard Deck

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Eternal Duelist Soul is one of my favorite Yugioh games and it embodies my favorite era of Yugioh. Fuck Pendulums, fuck Xyz, fuck Synchros, fuck E-Heros, fuck Chaos Control, fuck Yata. 2002 Yugioh is real Yugioh, and this oldfag is still going strong playing card games in a 2002 format.

Monsters:
1x Jinzo
3x Goblin Attack Force
1x Witch of the Black Forest
2x Sangan
3x White Magical Hat
1x Cyber Jar
1x Morphing Jar
3x Magician of Faith
1x Sinister Serpent

Spells:
1x Dark Hole
1x Raigeki
1x Harpies’ Feather Duster
2x Graceful Charity
1x Monster Reborn
1x Pot of Greed
1x Change of Heart
1x Heavy Storm
1x Snatch Steal
1x Confiscation
2x Delinquent Duo
1x The Forceful Sentry
3x Mystical Space Typhoon
1x Nobleman of Crossout
1x United We Stand
2x Premature Burial

Traps:
1x Mirror Force
1x Imperial Order
3x Time Seal
1x Ring of Destruction

Yugioh Eternal Duelist Soul: Cyber-Stein Deck

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Eternal Duelist Soul is one of my favorite Yugioh games and it embodies my favorite era of Yugioh. Fuck Pendulums, fuck Xyz, fuck Synchros, fuck E-Heros, fuck Chaos Control, fuck Yata. 2002 Yugioh is real Yugioh, and this oldfag is still going strong playing card games in a 2002 format.

Monsters:
3x Mystic Tomato
1x Witch of the Black Forrest
2x Sangan
1x Cyber Jar
3x Cyber-Stein
2x Morphing Jar
3x Magician of Faith
1x Sinister Serpent

Spells:
1x Dark Hole
3x Megamorph
1x Harpies’ Feather Duster
2x Graceful Charity
1x Card Destruction
1x Monster Reborn
1x Pot of Greed
1x Change of Heart
2x Heavy Storm
3x Upstart Goblin
1x Snatch Steal
3x Mystical Space Typhoon
1x Painful Choice
1x Premature Burial

Extra:
1x Blue-Eyes Ultimate Dragon
1x The Last Warrior from Another Planet
1x Thousand Eyes Restrict